Christmas

Goodness, so now Christmas is over and the new year is almost here.

Christmas was good this year dispite some bumps in the road. First, on Christmas eve my papa Orszak(dad's father) was rushed to the er. He is 85 years old, so we all followed. You just never know, and I don't like to think about it. My papa is a great man. I lived with my grandparents my teen years and they survived that. : ) Sorry if I seem to ramble a bit its 4am here. He is at home now, he was released Christmas day. They think he may have had a ministroke.

Also I got a super great suprise from my girlfriends! Now to back up a bit, for about a year now some of us girls from high school have been getting together for a girls night out.(thanks to facebook) The last one we celebrated the fact that my PET scan was clear.
My friend Jackie(we have been besties since HS and talk pretty much everyday)came over the tues before Christmas with her daughter to help me out with shopping and her daughter was going to watch the kids. Well Destiny walking in a handed me a card and said you soo have to read this it is from my aunt in Nebraska and it is hilarious. So I opened it and was like Des you left your money inside. Jackie told me to look again. Inside the card was a note from all the girls and money!!! To help out with last min Christmas shopping(which it was all pretty much last min) I was speechless and shaking. These girls are amazing!

So Christmas was a blast and I didn't give to much thought about cancer. Family asked questions but thats ok. I am fine talking about it. Doesn't make me feel like I am bottled up. Although now that Christmas is over I know that chemo is coming soon. I am on that emotional roller coaster again. Hubby is still having a hard time dealing sometimes. I see that in his actions and his short temper. I have one child that will test your nerves. So things have been kinda up and down in the house. Hubby and I had a rather large disagreement over discipline. I am hoping that we can go talk to someone soon, because if not I am not sure that we are going to come through this together. We tend not to communicate our feelings with each other until it is too late and we are angry about something else. Its not healthy and we have gone to counseling before because of it.

We did also take all 6 kids to see Alvin and the chipmunks at the theatre. First time EVER taking all 6. Although the teenage kids are not a problem and really the middle two were good. Katie even sat through it. Zachery not so much, his attention span is still only 30min tops.

My oldest son has gone to fla this week with my hubby's parents. They had a friend whose mother passed away. I figured since he knew them too and it would give him a break from the fam for a while. He has been really great helping out around the house for the past few weeks. Also this whole situation is stressing him out too.,so it is a much needed vacation for him.

Mom will be here this Sunday to help out. Thank goodness, I am worried about how I am going to handle chemo with so many kids. I know that MIL is next door but she does have to work and this way I will have someone here 24/7. I already have lots of support but she will be that little extra that I will need. Not just to help with the kids but if I have one of those "I need my mommy" moments. Hey don't laugh you know what I am talking about.

So my first chemo is scheduled for Jan 6th. Just a few days before my 33rd birthday but hey it is better than to have started it before Christmas. I was already tired enough there is no way I could have gotten through it doing chemo too! Sis I think is going with me. I have starting thinking about what I am going to take with me since I was told that I will be there for about 7 hours the first time. After that maybe 4 hours each time. I am having 8 rounds of chemo every 3 weeks. I am doing a clinical trial of taxol, gemzar, and avastin. I was told this is a more harsh group of chemo, but I am young and should be able to handle it well. The avastin will make my hair fall out and it usually happens about 10-14 days after my first infusion. One of them I think them causes bone pain because it will make the bone marrow grow at a faster rate. So they said for a few days after I will feel like I have the flu. Those are going to be the main side effects. I am taking anti naus. meds so that I will not get sick. They don't like for you to get sick anymore.
Oh and hot flashes was another but doesn't matter cause I already have those-lol

So, I am off to bed again. Katie was up coughing and I gave her some meds and waited for her to fall back asleep and stop coughing. We have pink eye running around the house. yeah me.
night night